Last night, I walked 3.6 miles downtown to meet a friend for dinner.
Quick tangent: Can you believe the lengths I will go to avoid actually working out? I wanted to work off some calories from yesterday but I did NOT want to set foot in the gym. So instead I walked 3.6 miles in flip flops and a dress. The sores on my feet are still oozing.
Anyway. I was walking past the Fuse Network, across from Penn Station, when I noticed a small crowd of people surrounding a man in a cowboy hat.
Being, well, a New Yorker, I immediately thought it was the Naked Cowboy. Until I got closer and realized, oh hey, it’s only my FAVORITE REALITY STAR EVER (and also, former rock star or something.)
He of the botox and eyeliner and ever-present bandana to conceal what we can only assume is a receding hairline.
Ladies and gentleman, I present to you…Bret Fucking Michaels:
I marched right up to him and introduced myself.
Clink: “Hey, I’m Clink and I love your show.”
Bret Fucking Michaels: “Aww, thanks baby, thanks baby.”
As I took a few camera phone pictures of him, I said, “Don’t threaten me with a good time, Bret.” (Y’all should get that reference, because you do watch the show right? HOW CAN YOU NOT WATCH THIS SHOW? It is God’s gift to us, people. Do not refuse it.)
He cracked up. A woman next to me made a slurping sound and pronounced Bret “delicious,” which was my cue to leave and call M who was, in all sincerity, totally jealous.
Sigh. Sometimes I really love New York.
Haha. That show is pretty awesome. I love how he was like ‘Oh Tamara (I think?) is one of the hottest women I’ve ever seen. We can’t have a conversation, but then I just look at her and it’s all okay.’ This man, my friends, is like THE definition of k-l-a-s-s.
P.S.- That’s hilarious how you just walked up to him and introduced yourself. I would have cell-phone-camera-stalked him, but never in a million years have had the courage to actually say anything!
Haha I just love it.
Somehow I was able to get here through Google Reader. But Jesus, Clink, really, the weirdness lately of your posts and then the experiences I have.
Three years ago I met Bret Michaels and played catch with him at the Verizon Wireless Ampitheatre here in San Antonio. I was there early because I was raising money for something and he happened to be out in the grass. So I went up to him and I said, “I love you!” and he said “Come here, come here!” And so I went over there with my friend and at the time I was in the military and he was telling me how his Dad was a vet and showed me a tattoo. We threw the ball around for a little bit and then we said goodbye. They were opening for the KISS show that night.
Oh. And I’ve never seen the show. I just have a thing for hair bands.
Is it wrong that I have no idea who Bret Michaels is or what show you are talking about???
Google time.
Wow. Yes it is wrong. I suck.
My step father would shoot me for not realizing who he was.
*runs away in shame*
Um, yeah, so now I’m pissed. This is the first summer in five years I haven’t been to see Poison live. And you meet Bret. Damn you, Clink. Damn you.
Kwarter - Omigod, the best was when he was saying that she was so hot that he didn’t care if he had to send up smoke signals or beat on a log to communicate with her. HILARIOUS.
Molly - Me too.
Crystal - What is up with our cosmic connection lately? Was he sweet when you met him? He seems like a pretty down to earth guy, believe it or not.
Sasharay - I knew you’d figure it out eventually. AND START WATCHING ROCK OF LOVE. That’s an order.
Mike - A Poison fan! I love it! Well, if it makes you feel any better, Bret seemed really cool, sweet and articulate. I kind of have a crush on him now. I had “Every Rose Has Its Thorn” in my head all last night.
Oh, my effing G, Bret Michaels! You’re so lucky. I SO want to be on that show but I’m not enough of a hooah, my boobs are too small, and, oh yeah, I’m not single. But SERIOUSLY, during the phone sex contest, HOW DID ONE OF THOSE GIRLS NOT THINK TO SING “EVERY ROSE HAS ITS THORN” IN A SKANKY VOICE? Bret loves himself, and he loves skanks. It would have been a winning combination.
Don’t you mean “Every thorn has it’s rose?” Ha. That’s what that scary manly girl said was a really deep and meaningful song on the first episode.
Then she got eliminated and did some weird awkward man hug when she left.
I remember that episode Molly! She was a beast of a “woman”.
And Clink, how did you have the cajones to just walk up and pop an intro like that? That’s awesome!
that is hilarious.
and awesome.
we get few celebs here in scarolina!
That is awesome. C and I caught the show in Vegas and were immediately HOOKED… That Bret is the MAN!
3.6 miles??? JEALOUS.
that is hysterical. only in new york. i don’t think bret michaels would be traipsing newbury st. nope…don’t think so.
I love it! I probably would have said the same thing to him because that show is AWESOME!
I am jealous…