BrideFriends July 30, 2007

It probably wasn’t the best idea for me to watch Father of the Bride on Saturday morning considering I was a day away from my period and therefore highly emotional and therefore I sobbed throughout the whole thing. 
 
Like, start to finish. Like, not even an exaggeration. Like, hi, could we get some crazy pills over here? Thanks.  
 
*** 
 
Last night, M and I went out for Mexican (diet? I do not know this diet of which you speak) with two other couples, both engaged.  
 
The sound from the female end of the table can only be described as squawking. Get three brides to be (October ’07, July ’08, September ’08) together in the same place and they will not stop talking for the duration of the meal, only stopping to shovel bites of food when another bride is discussing the roughest part of her wedding planning thus far: the color scheme (“wait, you can have three colors? My world just changed.”)  
 
The truth is, there couldn’t be three more different brides planning three more different weddings. The first child in me feels compelled to make a list: 
 
Bride A: Early thirties, lives at home, from a very wealthy and well-connected family. Is planning what can only be described as a Platinum Wedding. Seriously, people. There’s no way to put this into words except to say that their engagement party was akin to most people’s weddings, with a cocktail hour, a sit-down dinner, a band, a Viennese hour and 200 people. The wedding will be close to 400 people and will feature, amongst other things, an 11-piece orchestra and breakfast served at 1am. BREAKFAST. As in, they are feeding us at the cocktail hour, feeding us at the dinner, feeding us at the Viennese hour and then FEEDING US BREAKFAST. The rock on the bride’s finger is only slightly smaller than your average baseball and they are taking a three-week honeymoon across the world, a “gift” from the bride’s parents (because the “gift” of the wedding and the “gift” of buying them a home clearly wasn’t enough). I’m not bitter or jealous, as it’s not anything I would want for myself (do you even know 400 people? I do not know 400 people). I’m just in awe that something like this is occurring outside of the movies. 
 
Bride B: Me! You know all about my wedding, clearly. But, to put it into context, here are some quick stats: 175 people, held at an elegant, modern loft in Manhattan; very simple and clean – from the centerpieces to the bridesmaids’ dresses; a city wedding through and through for which stunning views, a New York feel and great food and drinks are of the highest priority.  
 
Bride C: Late twenties, very independent, never really thought she’d get married. Refuses to adhere to tradition (might have a pink dress!), wants something very simple and casual. Is currently planning a garden party on an estate in Massachusetts and wants to keep things as low-key as possible. Could not stress enough just how non-opulent she wants it to be; is considering serving barbeque.  
 
See? Different. And yet, when you’re getting married, it doesn’t matter how different your visions are. You are bound because you are women and you are planning a wedding and that is enough to make you fast friends. I know each of these women through M, one is the future wife of his friend from college and the other bride is his friend. I’ve met them both on multiple occasions and have always enjoyed their company.  
 
However, last night was something different. We crossed the line from “friendly” to “friends.” BrideFriends.These are people who actually listen and care when I discuss whether or not pink and brown bridesmaid dresses will clash with black tuxes. These are people I actually take seriously as we debate the merits of a platinum band versus white gold. These are people who can relate when I talk about my seven bridesmaids and how I’m considering adding an eighth.  
 
One of them even admitted to weeping over Father of the Bride, which is proof that being around these new BrideFriends makes me feel less crazy. No easy feat, clearly.