Competition. Specifically, how I feel about it. January 21, 2008
I am not, nor have I ever been, a competitive person.
In fact, competition is one of those things that makes me kind of feel like vomiting, right up there with seeing a dead rat stuck to a glue trap on a New York City sidewalk and the thought of M cheating on me.
You see, I’ve was nominated for three Twentysomething Blogger Awards: Best Big Blog, Most Interesting and Most Encouraging.
Of course, in true Clink fashion, I had to make a big dramatic deal (mostly to Peter and Molly) about how I hate competition and I especially hate competition when it comes to blogging, which should be a safe space to be yourself without being a popularity contest.
I love blogging now, when I have a readership that never fails to amaze me and I loved it then, when I got exactly zero comments and five hits a day, mostly by accident. I would do it no matter what. While I’m thrilled that I was nominated for something I’m so passionate about, the thought of there being a “winner” and “losers” makes me break out in hives.
Truthfully, writing is subjective. I learned that in college when one of my professors thought I would be the Next Big Thing and another one didn’t understand why my short stories didn’t have a beginning, middle and satisfying conclusion. Blogging is especially subjective in that you could respect someone’s writing but not be particularly interested in the content or vice versa.
So, I chose to withdraw from the competition.
I know, I know, dramatic. But that doesn’t mean I don’t support the awards - I do, just for other people. Trust me, I’m not sitting here with a “NO AWARDS! DOWN WITH AWARDS!” poster attached to a stick, occasionally getting off my ass to do a few laps around my bedroom (that would mean, um, actually having to leave my bed on this glorious day off and yeah, no.) I just know what’s right for me and I know what’s not and I made a decision based on that.
Not that, you know, any of you were wondering but I felt the need to get it off my chest.
There. That’s better.
And now I’m going to go enjoy my day off (first time I’ve ever had this day off since I started working in 2003) and:
-seduce M, who is currently sleeping peacefully next to me
-work out
-read more coverage of the GIANTS and HOW THEY ARE GOING TO THE SUPER BOWL
-try not to think about the fact that my fiance is a Pats fan
-eat brunch and see a movie and shop with my girlfriends
-finish The Nine (highly recommended book about the Supreme Court for Supreme Dorks like me)
-do a little dance every once in a while because I still can’t get over the fact that I’m not at work today
I started reading this and was like “Oh no! I’ve already voted and I didn’t vote for Clink at all.” Then I went through the “but I didn’t see her name on any of the lists!” And then that was cleared up.
Congrats on being nominated. And wow to the turning it down. That’s pretty awesome
Yay for having today off! Yay for the Giants (OH MY GOD SUCH A GREAT GAME)! Yay all around!
award or no award, you are awsome!
and competition makes me queasy too, just can’t do it. actually DID barf on the side of a the feild in a state soccer competions one year, yeech, and we won.
OM is a serious Pats fan too, they are like a diety in our household, i cant WAIT for the superbowl to be over…
Gah, I’m the same way with competition, and just reading your post about it made me a little anxious. However, I must say that I do think your blog and your writing are brilliant, and you definitely deserved to be nominated for every single one of those awards.
Oh, and for the record, any college professor that can’t seem to fathom stories that don’t have some distinct structure needs to not be a professor.
Enjoy your day off!
At least one of you will be happy on February 3, right?
Enjoy your day off! Sounds like it’s going to be a good one.
Go Pats! Hehe–just had to throw that in there.
And me? I’m hating that you have the day off because I don’t : (
Have a yummylicious brunch for me!
Blogging is so subjective- I couldn’t agree more. Your blog just so happens to be one which I enjoy the content, the style, and the writer. But there are many blogs I breeze through, that yeah, good style and way with words, but I’m just not so much into the content. So, I guess I’m saying, I hear you.
Enjoy the day off! Looks like our respective teams are going to the Superbowl!
I was preparing my “ballot” and getting ready to vote (for you, actually) when I noticed your nominations were taken down. I have a knack for noticing details, sorry. It’s what I do. It made me a bit sad, but I totally get where you’re coming from.
Like you, I hate competition. I remember blogging about it before and saying I didn’t feel the need to compete, ever. And then the comment numbers rose, and found it much too fascinating.
People nominated me for things, and I enjoyed it far more than I would’ve liked. Disconcerting, really. That’s just not me. And then I couldn’t write about the things that matter anymore, because I wasn’t smart enough to go completely anon. So I shut down the blog.
I’ll still be reading. I sincerely think you’re one of the best bloggers ever. Enjoy your day off!
I don’t know. I think it was too early in the formation of 20SB to have awards. There are a lot of the same names, over and over again on the nomination pages. Truth be told, it always hurts to be passed over, and I likely won’t do much with the group if it’s just another big popularity contest. Sure, group members made the nominations, not the main orchestrators of the group itself, but still. I guess I’m just sour grape-y. I mean, I write for me, and for the outlet, and for the people I’ve met online, twentysomething or not, but yeah, it hurts and it sucks. I guess I’m just a big whiny baby.
Good for you for not getting wrapped up in it all, though I totally would have voted for you. In every category. Which is another complaint I have- maybe more people would have been nominated if there was a limit to how many categories a single blog could be entered into…
Nevermind. Just never-damn-mind. Enjoy your day off!
while you were definitely deserving of the nominations, i completely understand where you’re coming from. i guess in this “little” community that i’ve become a part of i can’t see it becoming a popularity contest really. like not in the high school ohmygodtheressomuchdrama kind of way.
but preach on - i’ll be here reading of course
Looks like you’re going to have to take hostage that Pats trash can…
I am the same way about competition–i was actually very surprised that I got nominated for anything! I don’t care who wins because i’m up against some fabulous writers, I’m just happy that more than one person thought highly enough of me to nominate me and i’m sitting there amongst all those wonderful writers
Congrats on your nominations though, you are all sorts of fabulous. Enjoy your day off!!
Enjoy your day off, love!
While I am VERY competitive on occasion — I’d snap someone’s leg to win a game of hopscotch — I think pretty much any kind of award for something subjective is just silly.
It’s like “fastest unicorn.”
Or “most attractive republican.”
I liked The Nine.
Have a great day off!
I have the utmost respect for your decision. Good thing I’m in my 30s, otherwise, I’d be subjected to NOT being nominated in the first place.
Enjoy your day off for the rest of us still working!!!
i feel the same way about awards for blogging….
and i admire what you did.
and i hate you for having the day off.
(heh. not really….)
<3
I’m jealous of your day off. And all the fun you’ll have.
I have a big proposal due today, so I’ll be sweating and grimacing at the steady dial on the clock. Have extra fun for me!
It’s funny. I saw your name up there, and then I didn’t, and it made me think you were even more awesome than you already are. Partially because if you were in the awards, I think you were an automatic win based on your tremendous readership, and partially because you really are quality reading.
It just made me respect you more. I hate competition too, but I decided to stay, mostly because if people really think my stuff is good enough, then that speaks for reaching out to people, not just being popular. I don’t anticipate winning - the honor is more than enough for me. end soapbox spiel.
So anyway. I’m really excited for your day off! I’m going to the gym, because I’ve been lazy about it for the last two days. Though I did figure out how to make room to do pilates on my floor. Whoo!
Also. Seduce M again? For all of us who can’t seduce anyone at the time being? K. Thanks.
Enjoy your day off, and maybe? Do a little dance that would help me get out of work a little early? Kthanxbai.
I heart you.
Enjoy the day. Especially the part about the Super Bowl — because you won’t be enjoying it at about 9:30 on February 3rd. Though i do venture to guess you’ll enjoy the view of tom brady’s ass as he hoists the lobardi trophy (again).
Enjoy your day off! Brunch and shopping sound like so much fun.
We love you without any awards at all… your award is each and every comment! =) Aww…
And, blecch, I am leaving you this comment from my computer in my office at work right now. At work. Right now. We do not get MLK Jr Day off. But I am taking a half-day anyway…
Enjoy yours!!!
I want to ditto distracted spunk. she’s right, dude.
competition or no competition, you’ll still have the people who love you stopping by to visit! xo
you rock. it’s as simple as that.
when the topic of blogger awards came up on 20sb, i was highly skeptical because of the fact that blogging shouldn’t be about competition. it’s about us, about writing what we feel the need to get out there.
while i was honored to be nominated (because dude, i never get nominated for anything), i agree with you that blogging should never be about a popularity contest. competition tends to bring out the ugly side in people.
i really respect your decision. and you.
duh.
I am super jealous of your day off…as I sit here typing this at work and waiting for my last hour and 1/2 to go faster…just go faster! Anyway, because I am so jealous I almost said something mean about the Giants, but I will not go there because that’s just uncool. Enjoy the rest of your day =).
I can’t wait to hear if you and M stay sane on Super Bowl Sunday with your teams going at it like that. Wooooo!
you lucky beyotch! I’m at work - and it’s my fault too - I chose to work today! Damn me!
Yay for you:
-backing out when you didn’t agree with the awards thing (i totally second this)
-having the day off today!
-having a Super Bowl team to root for (and a “friendly” rivalry with M). Sigh…I knew what this was like back in 2007 with all those damn people from Indiana….
-shopping and movie time (i did the same today)
Wow. You amaze me, really.
Have fun seducing M, and thanks for the book name drop. I might actually read it. Is it good? Or is it just dry informational stuff, and B would actually like it more than I would?
Heart you, Clink. You are sooo lucky you got the day off. So. Lucky.
I know what you mean about the whole competitiveness of blogging regarding what you’re nominated for, how many comments you get yadda yadda.
Everyone started writing on blogs for the same reason I would think … to write. Being recognized for it is just the cherry on top of an already delicious sundae. Congrats on the nods and hope you had a relaxing day off.
Even though you withdrew, congrats on the nominations! I think you deserved it. But I see your point about competition. Competition between friends can make things ugly. I hope you had a lovely day off, and lounged around a lot.
you know, i was wondering why your name wasn’t up there! but your decision? totally props-worthy. kudos to you for going with your gut
i heart you and your amazing self.
You’re a winner…
Seriously, GO GIANTS.
I’m so excited for the Super Bowl and the Giants that my brain is like swelling up.
go, Clink!