Having a hard time getting it up for the blog these days. February 21, 2008
I had a chat with myself recently, in the shower. I told myself that it was okay to not post every day, to not post every detail. Okay to maybe not want feedback. Okay to feel less inclined to read other blogs and leave comments. Okay to think that maybe I’ve outgrown Clink, just a bit. And - somewhere between the shampoo and the shaving - I realized that it was okay to take a step back.
And so I have.
I’ve still been writing - I started a public blog and I’m also writing for a website that is paying me real, actual dollars. To, like, type words. On a screen. In my own voice.
I know. I’m shocked too.
I just don’t feel the need to dissect my life anymore. Not because it’s perfect (see: starting a fight with M while driving back from the Hamptons because his phone was off; it wasn’t even about his phone being off, it was about me needing attention because he’s been so fucking busy lately and hi, I’m High Maintenance, nice to meet you), but because it’s…full.
A friend of a friend recently told me - after about four drinks - that she thinks I have everything.
I told her that, of course, I don’t.
But I do think I have enough.
And at least for right now, having enough means that I don’t need the blog nearly as often. That’s actually a nice feeling, to be honest. The blog was a bit of a crutch for so long, but now I feel like I’m fully healed. Like I can stand on my own.
Of course - because I am the universe’s most favoritest plaything - this could all go to shit tomorrow and I’ll be back to needing a place to exhale, to release some thoughts, to get some feedback.
In the meantime, let’s consider this a little hiatus.
But, before I go, thank you to the thousands of you who have been supportive and withheld judgment, who have read and commented or read and not commented, who have made me feel less crazy, who have made me feel more loved. The universe may like to fuck with me, but not even the universe could deny me some kick ass freaders.
Good Luck! Not that you’ll need it
and we’ll all miss you.
I have been wondering where you were, and how you are. I’m glad that things are mostly going well, and that you are feeling… sated? We will miss you on your hiatus. If you feel compelled to stop in and post about fun wedding details? Without dissecting your life? Well, that would TOTALLY be okay with me. Just saying.
Hey -
I just started reading your blog about a week ago.
I mean - reading every single entry.
I love it, it made me laugh a lot….
At first, I felt a little weird reading someone else’s life ( this was my first real blog experience), but then I got used to it, and checked your site every single day…maybe even twice
Thanks for posting so frequently when your life was a little crazy, it makes me feel….well…normal
Best wishes in everything
I don’t think you need it, sounds like you have a pretty solid grasp of things.
And thanks, for letting me into your life…a little.
Cheers
Meg.
Ugh you go to the Hamptons? I hate you.
Hehe no, I ADORE you, duh. Would you like a bagel?
You will be missed. Most definitely!
I already miss your writing. I’ve adored you from day 1, which may seem a little creepy, but it’s true. Hope to hear more from you!
Ciao bella!
Good luck! I figured you were going this way for awhile ;). I am thinking the same thing, but because law school is making my life suck so much that the blog just takes way too much energy to not be all WOE IS ME on it all the time. Full life in a different way!
1) Sorry to see you go, but I understand your reasons why.
2) I got to indulge in PB&Razz’s chocolate yummies last weekend - OMG such yummy-in-my-tummy! We spoke of you!
3) Would love to see your public blog. Did I miss the announcement? Will you share it with me - even if you have to email it to me offline?
4) Be good to you.
Selfishly, I’m bummed! I enjoy your blog so much
But…unselfishly - that’s great, and so happy that you are so content and your life is ‘full’! 
I’d love to see your public blog too…if you’d be willing to email or post it.
There is no way that you could possibly think that the universe messes with you more than it messes with me.
Selfishly, I’m bummed that you’re taking a hiatus from the blog, but in all seriousness, congrats to you! It’s a good thing for life to be going well.
Although I have not been a reader since day 1…I have read all your entries and loved each and every one of them. I wish you nothing but the best! Thank you for letting us have a glimpse of your life and helping some us to feel like someone out there…gets it!
Good Luck!
good for you. sad for all of us… but good for you. maybe your blog has served it’s purpose. maybe it’s purpose was more than a place to vent, maybe it’s purpose was to find you a friend you needed. a friend like Molly. (that’s my assumption of the situation by the way you two speak of your connection).
so just like everything else, you learn from it, take what you’re given, and move on.
best of luck in everything! (and it’s kick ass that someone is paying you $$ to write!)
Do whatever you need to do. I love you though and I still want to meet you when I come out there in a few weeks…
Enjoy your time off. I’ll be thinking of you.
We will definitely miss you around here, Clink. But I think I can understand where you’re coming from. You’ve entered a new phase in your life. Congratulations and really, enjoy your life. You do have it pretty good
Much love.
I’m glad your life is full (if not perfect) and going well - though I’m sorry you’re pulling back on the blog a bit, as I enjoy reading… But really? In the scheme of things? It’s a blog vs. your life. I’m glad your life is winning this one!
Best wishes hun. If you don’t come back, then thank you for allowing us to take a peek into your life for as long as you did. Your wit and humor will be missed. Glad life is wonderful!
Oh I totally understand as I took a hiatus myself a few months back. Of course we will miss you and your stories and your wedding planning and your desire for bagels. And I’m a little sad as, well, you were one of the first blogs I started reading abuot 3 years ago when you started this thing. So it’s….weird. Sad. I’ll miss you.
But your life IS more important than this so live it. It’s great to hear that you are doing some writing (and getting paid for it). And if I’m in the NY area anytime soon, I’ll let you know
oh and i would love to know more about this public blog (email me if necessary)!
I know the feeling. Don’t sweat it — the next time you’re in the deli and someone bumps into you and accidentally grabs your boob, you’re gonna be like, “I HAVE TO TELL THE WORLD.” And you’ll be back.
I hope your hiatus isn’t too long because I was looking forward to more of your wedding blogging. And I agree with Erin, where’s the public blog?? So we can all Blog Stalk you.
Is that as creepy as it sounds??
You’ll be missed!
I am so so happy that you are in a good place but also sad that I won’t be reading your words. Yours is the first blog that I started reading. I love your honesty and your writing. I am glad you are not giving up writing, you are so talented.
oh no! i’m not sure i’ve ever commented before, but i’ve been an avid reader for a while. i’m really going to miss your posts! but as others have said, i’m glad that you are feeling like throwing away the crutch & doing a jig. or something. would love to follow your writing elsewhere if possible?
thank you.
and you are welcome.
I don’t wish for you to have bad things or need this place, but i sure hope to see you around every now and again.
I’m happy for you, but so so sad at the same time. I’m gonna miss my daily dose of Clink!
I’d also love to read elsewhere, if you choose to let me (email?
)
Purty please post from time to time just to keep us updated. I definitely want to hear more about the wedding and what it feels like to be M’s wife.
Congrats on not needing a crutch though. That must be an amazing feeling.
No, don’t go!
I’ll miss you, Clink. Best of luck.
Take care of you!
Hope we can email and/or chat on the G…
Hearts, hugs, and love,
(and, yes, sunshine and sausages!)
JenBun
I’m with everyone else on here- you were the first blog that I really picked up reading. You’re life was interesting- it’s easy to see why your friend would be envious- but more than that, your writing was excellent. It was always thought provoking, heart warming, and funny all at the same time. I know there are soo many people that would read you daily, and I was definitely one of them. But if you have to go, then this is the best reason for it. I’m really happy for you that your life finally feels “full” enough. That’s great
So keep up the excellent writing, wherever it is you decide to do it. And if they’re paying you? That’s even better!
Good luck with everything- and I’m still planning to check back every once in a while. You know, just in case
-Sandy
oh- and I’m also interested in the public blog? If you don’t plan to give it out I totally understand. But if theres somewhere I can read more of your writing I’d totally be interested! Just email it to me if you want to.
Sad to see you go- congrats on the public blog and the real, live, money-paying site! Hopefully I’ll stumble across one of them one day (without knowing it’s you, of course), since I love your writing.
And like lots of others have said, pretty please post some more wedding planning/actual (headless) pics!!
No, wait, don’t go. Well if you have to (do you?) then okay. I’ll miss ya.
I feel the same way. You are awesome and I’m glad you are in a place where you don’t need the outlet anymore.
Blog hiatus is good. As long as you keep writing elsewhere, all is well with the world.
I have four letters for you: A. M. E. N.
xoxo
I think we’re all reaching that point a little bit- everyone I read is getting to the hiatus point, and then I’m feeling a little less in love with mine. Just make sure you email and facebook, ok?
Do we have to breakup? can we still email? can I still covet your accessories b/c something tells me they’re fierce!
Don’t be a stranger lady. I’ll miss ya.
You’ll be sorely missed. You are a talented writer and eloquent communicator-of-feelings (which evidently, I am not).
I realise you’re not publishing your public site, because you want to keep your public & anonymous selves separate, but could you email it to me? You don’t know me from adam but… pretty please? I won’t tell anyone. I don’t know anyone to tell.
Best of luck!
I’m really glad you’ve found the balance and have a step back.
Being overwhelmed constantly, albeit interesting and exhilarating at times, may not be good for the soul and peace of mind.
I’m really happy for you. Best of luck.
Happy to hear you are getting paid to write it’s something we all hope to do! I’m sad that you won’t be posting here anymore, you help me to remember that my little bit of craziness is actually normal!
I would also love to be able to read your public blog.
Best of luck with all your new adventures!
The blogosphere without Clink? A strange thing indeed.
You were one of the first I read when I started with this whole thing. And so, thank you. And good luck. I look forward to the next time you pop up in my Google Reader
You will definitely be missed, but enjoy the time off
best post i’ve read thus far.
great last line! good luck in life…
Ohh I’m going to miss you! Yours was one of the very first blogs I began reading. It does sound that you are at a good place in your life at the moment though, and that’s awesome
As is getting paid to write! Congrats!
I love your writing and hope you come back here every now and then. I’d love to be able to read your new blog but of course that’s obviously up to you. For what it’s worth, ditto to what Madeleine said … I’m not from the US and would keep it to myself - I don’t have anyone to tell either because no one knows I read this blog!
Whatever you decide to do, I wish you only happiness and good things. Thanks for sharing ‘you’ with us.
While I was an infrequent commenter, I was a frequent reader. You’re such a gifted writer, I’m really going to miss indulging in your talent. I’m keepin’ my fingers crossed that I’ll get to enjoy your writings again someday.
(I just spaced out momentarily, which allowed me to notice there is a teeny tiny smiley face at the bottom of your page. I’m a real sucker for all things miniaturized, and that lil smiley is super cute!)
Best of luck, Clink!
My dearest Clink.
I miss you already.
Please come back.
But only when you are ready.
we will always be ready for you.
Your favorite Patriots/Sox fan!
ohhh but I just found your blog!! you can’t leave yet!! =)
come back soon, i’ll be eagerly awaiting your next post to pop up on my google reader! =)
I write for three other sites in addition to my personal site and I also have this whole job thing. The one that pays me real money and gives me health insurance and they expect me to write out crap there as well. And dude, it is so damn tiring. I end up using the same words over and over and over again because I no longer have the brain power. So, I empathize with you, more than you know. Good luck and either way, you’re great.
oh clink…i’ll really miss you. really.
don’t stay gone for keeps.
xoxo.
Ughh… I feel like a blog reading curse. First The Company Bitch and now you too? Seeeeeeeeeriously…. I’m bummed
I’ve come to see blogging as a social experiment, an adventurous risk, a foray of sorts; it’s a way of expression and a step towards definition, but at some point you’ve got to pack back up for home. It’s an amazing and worthwhile journey, but it’s not meant to last forever.
Thank you for being a part of this space for so long.
I’m feeling the exact.same.way. I think it’s going around, or maybe we have all grown together, or is it apart?
I too, however would be interested in the other places you are writing, so do tell if you desire!
Holy crap. I’ll miss you. But I understand why you have to go (though I’ll cling on to hope that you’ll be back and soon, even if it’s uber sporadic writing). Great that you’ve found balance in your life.
And thank you for writing. It’s been the best, knowing you. Hugs and kisses.
PS: Umm are we getting the link to the your paid website writing? I so love reading “your voice.” It’ll be better than going all cold turkey.
Clink -
I’m happy for you that you feel that you don’t need this blog as much anymore, but I also hope that you will continue to update your loyal readers as to what’s going on in your life. You are on my list of daily reads and I plan to keep checking in. Good luck with the wedding and everything else!!
you’ll be missed of course! good luck on your new writing endeavors and with the wedding planning. hope to hear about bits and pieces along the way!
xo
Clink!
Like all the others who got here before me, I can’t resist the urge to plead, “PLEASE don’t go!!” At the same time, I am happy that you don’t need your “crutch” anymore. But, that just sucks so much for us.
I’ll miss your writing, and your personality. Truly.
If you feel so inclined to email me the link to where are writing now, I promise I’d never betray your secret. I respect your need for anonymity, but I’d love to keep reading.
Erin
darn you are leaving? And I was just starting to come here, well best of luck , I understand completely the questioning and stuff. Its a good but bad addiction blogging, anyway all the best.
I think it’s good to take a step back and some time off, but know you will be missed! We love reading what you have to say.
I’m sad to lose this blog so soon after I discovered it. But I completely understand your decision. Good luck in whatever you choose to do!
Oh, but I feel like I just found you!!
Seriously though, I hope that your life continues down this path of “enoughness” and I’ll be keeping you on my feed reader should you ever decide to sneak back into our lives! I’ll miss you!
I know how you feel, and I’m so glad that others are enjoying your writing.
I will miss you. Really and truly. Take all the time you need, my dear.
Heart you!
no, thank YOU for being so kickass.
good luck, congrats, i’ll miss you. you rock, lady.
Hey Clink,
Best of luck in the future! I understand your wanting to back away from blogging, I think it happens to all of us. I’m glad to hear that you are still writing, you are an incredibly engaging writer, and very talented. You will be missed!
Hi there Clink,
As many have said already, I totally get that need to step back and maybe not put your life online for anyone (and everyone) to see for a while.
Just wanted to say thanks for writing, because it’s helped me grow SO much. I feel like I’m you four(ish)years ago, as a sophomore in college, trying to figure out why/how/who to date, who to stick with, how to get that Crazy to just sit in the corner and chill for a sec.
You have a literary streak I’m not used to seeing on blogs, and that’s a huge part of why I enjoy your writing so much. I really hope to (and know I will) see you in print someday!
Feeling ‘full’ sounds delightful. Enjoy it all.
You were one of those females that at first meeting I’d hate.
I have been reading your blog for a few weeks now (it’s a lot!) and you have become the reason why I get to work early to start my computer. I read you after I’m settled in with my morning coffee.
Though I thought I wouldn’t get you, your blogs kept me coming back and I have to say the more I read about you, the more I realized I need to re-evaluate my prejudice about people in general- and I call myself a Christian. Your shit is real everyday shit that we all struggle with.
Anyway, not great with words, I wish I could express how much I will miss you.
Take Good Care of yourself and that man of yours.
I am so happy that you’re feeling like you can step out from behind the sheild of your bog and thrive in your life - it’s hard when our blogs become all consuming - they are often a place for which we run and hide instead of truly and fully participating in life itself. Kudos to you and thanks for all the great posts!
I miss your writing everyday. I do know exactly what you mean though- it’s the same reason I stopped writing in a journal about 2 years ago. I think that the desire to just live your life without analyzing everything is a sign of moving out of adolescence and into an adulthood. Something about being secure with who you are as a person. So congrats and best of luck!
I miss you dear.
Miss you, Clink. You have my email address if you ever decide to share your new blog address.
My friends told me about your site exactly one week ago. They mocked bits and pieces of your blog content, giggling about your talk of bridesmaid dresses, nights out in NY, neediness, and your nascent eating disorder.
I just want to let you know that I’ve never been as preoccupied with a blog as I have been with yours. Perhaps I vicariously live through you. I’m in LA, you’re in NY, and I have always fantasized about living in NY. Hey, it would be nice to walk everywhere opposed to driving everywhere… ugh.
Anyway, what intrigues me whenever I sit down at my computer, and scan a “Clink” entry, is your writing style. You have this way of drawing your reader in, you have this voice. This voice is amazing because it’s you.
Of course my friends have encouraged me to read their blogs, and every time I do, I find myself bored. Heck, even this week, the same friends who told me about your blog were like, “Don’t read Clink’s blog! Read ours… it’s an ORDER!” If only they knew that every time I skimmed their blogs, I longed for yours. Their blogs were salad, yours was a hot fudge sundae. I couldn’t keep stabbing my fork into a disappointing salad, unsatisfying bite after unsatisfying bite. Afterall, I do have a sweet tooth!
The difference between your blog, and I will guess, millions of other blogs, is that you are being you. Your honesty makes me wish we knew one another, could hang out over a latte at Starbucks. My friends’ entries come out forced, as if they are trying to damn hard. Yours are effortless because of your candidness, and because you’re you.
Please return soon. You are all I ever want to read when I turn on my laptop. I’m on May ‘07ish in your entries, and I’m a busy, busy girl. Somehow, I’ve found the time because you’re worth it. I only hope that you, yourself, realize you’re worth it.
Hi, so when I wrote that comment like a half an hour ago in your January entry, I obviously had not read this one. I just want to say that you are the blogger I wish to become. As everyone else says, you have a distinct voice and you’re writing style just suits what I love to read.
I hope you’re doing well and that you’re enjoying your life and wedding planning. I miss you, even if I have just discovered your blog.
Hey Clink. I started reading your blog a few months ago (how I stumbled upon it I’m really not too sure since I live all the way in Malaysia!!!) … and it is honestly one of the most compelling ones I have ever read. Because you’re so honest about your life and that makes it real to your readers. Also, you introduced me, albeit unknowingly, to Molly, who’s also now one of my fave bloggers to read! So, I hope you enjoy life as it’s dealing you right now, but a part of me keeps checking to see if you’ve uploaded.
Cheers.
I hope you come back!
I know I’m late reading this but I cut back on my daily blog reading for awhile about the time you posted this.
I can’t help but think your withdrawal has something to do with the negativity you got recently.
It’s rough having the crazies come after you for no good reason. Always made me think of the pitchfork-brandishing villager scenes from old horror movies, lol!
But the truth is, when you no longer feel safe blogging about your personal thoughts and ideas, whether it’s due to misunderstandings or even outright attacks, whether it’s just one person or 10, whether hundreds of people love reading you and only a few do not, it’s hard to go back to blogging freely again knowing the few who said crappy things are still reading.
I know for a fact this is true.
But I do hope you reconsider because I enjoyed reading you very much.
Hey You! I feel you on the step back as I’d taken one for eons. As for you I clearly need to catch up. Congrats on the upcoming nuptuals and if I can make it with out committing murder I know you can. You’re going to be a disgustingly hot bride. Cheers honey! And yay for marriage. It’s a beautiful thing.
::Exhales after checking with bated breath to see if Clink has changed her mind about ditching the blog, to only come up disappointed::
Sorry, that’s just the errant child in me who refuses to accept and respect your very logical, valid, brave decision. Which is something the sane, mature side of me does. We both really miss you, though. I hope you’re doing well—you and M, the work, the wedding planning et al.
Take care.
Oh, how I miss you! How I miss hearing the stories of you planning your wedding and work. Thank you for letting me get a glimpse of a city I’ve never been to but want to go someday. Thank you for giving us a glimpse into your life. You are wonderful!
I think your blog is wonderful - you are the voice of a big city girl with a big heart and immense talent - just wanted to say hey from your readers on the WEST COAST.
PS - My desk is also a mess
Okay, there is NO way you’ve stopped writing altogether. I suspect a secret blog is afoot, and I WANT IN! Email me, eh?
Hi,
sorry to bring this up, (unrelated to your post) but another blogger is taking other people’s posts and using them as her own, including some of yours. I discovered this after reading http://brainyjane22.wordpress.com, who it has also happened to. The offending blog is: http://scottsdalegirlinhollywood.blogspot.com
got a woody yet???………………hope you’ll be back
really miss your writing……….mags
ok! this is enough, it’s been a month and i miss you.
ok…yea….
this has gone on LONG ENOUGH missy.
get back here.
you can’t do this to US.
screw the haters.
we lovvvvveeee you.
So, I keep checking in almost every day, hoping you’ve changed your mind. If you ever want to send your new blog info to an anonymous reader, you have my e-mail.
Thank you for so many heartfelt posts over the years. I’ve loved reading about your life and adventures!
I understand the anonymous thing - my blog is like that, too. All the names are changed to protect the innocent. And the not-so-innocent as well.
Where did you go? Will you ever come back?
Just so you know, you are definitely missed.
I just started reading your BLOG and I think it’s great. I think it’s awesome you have a job that interests you and lets you write in your own voice. Congrats on being able to snatch up an opportunity like that! Good luck with your writing!
Hi Clink. COME BACK PLEASE! Please? I mean, I hope you’re enjoying your “hiatus” and personal time and everything, but, yeah. Come back. K thanks.
Love,
Becca (& Everyone)
Yeah, I’m with becca. You are missed.
Still check often to see if you are coming back.
Um… Hi! I bet you’re loving life and all. But here’s the thing. You know when The Office first came on and Jim and Pam were together but not together? totally flirting and both so in love with each other? Then! They finally kiss and you’re all relieved, b/c, right, they’re together now? But them Pam still says she’s marrying Roy (EW!)? Well, what if the writers just stopped writing leaving you on the biggest cliff of televison history? Wouldn’t your heart break?
I’m sad, clink. we all miss your humor and thoughts and quirks. AND GODDAMN IT WE’RE DYING TO KNOW HOW THE WEDDING WENT!!
Um, silly Ryan, the wedding hasn’t happened yet. I know this because I was recently reminded of Clink’s wedding on TheseLittleMoments. (I think Molly should wear the purple dress, just sayin’
That post also reminded me of just how much I miss reading about your fabulous city life, Clink.
I’m sure you’re putting your writing talents to good use in other outlets, but you are missed in the blog community. If the mood ever strikes - we’d love an update!